Dear Diary,
Today the house felt alive the moment I heard the front door slam. My boys home! I shouted, my heart leaping. Nicholas shuffled in, his cap in his hands, and muttered, Hey, Mum. He hesitated, then added, Im not alone. He nudged forward a skinny lad in glasses, a backpack slung over his shoulders.
My word, a grandgrandson! I gasped. Is that young Tom or little Sam? I cant tell without his glasses. Nicholas plonked himself onto a chair.
Just put the hat on, he said. This is Victor, my…my wayward son. Remember when Mabel and I separated for a year? I ended up with Valerie and Victor was born. I foolishly registered him under my name, he sighed, a rueful smile tugging at his lips.
I snapped at him, Why are you babbling about a child? Hes too young to know about your tangled past. Victor, go to the sitting room and have a look at the telly while I sort things out with your father. The lad slipped away without a word.
I lowered my voice, Does Mabel know about him? I asked quietly. She never liked my sons wifealways quarrelsome and sharptongued, Nicholas replied, a flicker of dread crossing his face.
Youre joking, mother? he muttered. If she ever found out shed have thrown him out barefoot. I built him from the ground up with my own two hands. I exhaled, Youre such a hopeless fellow, not a man but a weakling, forever under Mabels heel. How did you manage to have a child on the side? What purpose does bringing him here serve? If Mabel discovers this, Ill be in trouble.
Nicholas, visibly nervous, tried to explain, Valerie, that snake, was about to get married. She ran off with a new lover down south for a monthimagine! She called me, said, Take the boy wherever you like, even home. I told her Id gone mad, I have a wife now, shed throw us both out. She warned shed make my life miserable if I didnt comply. Ill give Mabel the birth certificate, you deal with it as you see fit. Thats the end for me. He lowered his eyes, unable to meet mine.
I shook my head, Youve been this way since you were a child. If anything goes wrong, Ill step in. Fine, where shall I put him? Keep the lad. But rememberhes not of our blood, I hesitated, Is he really yours?
Nicholas waved his hand, Hes mine, no doubt. Valerie isnt a saint, but shes a loyal woman. We fell silent. I sprang to my feet, What am I sitting here for? Lets at least give him something to eat.
Nicholas stood, Sorry, Mum, Ive got to go. Mabels waiting at home. I told her I was off to buy spare parts in the city. Feed Victor, Im off. He rushed out, and I clutched my bewildered son, whispering, God be with you, my dear.
Victor gobbled his food without looking up. Want more? I asked, pitying his speed.
No, thank you, he said, pushing his chair back. Go for a walk, Ill finish dinner. Whats in your backpack? I inquired.
Stuff, he muttered.
Will you wash it yourself or should I? I asked.
For the first time, his eyes widened with fear. I cant. My mother always did the washing.
I lifted his small knapsack, Alright, Ill look and rinse whats dirty. He disappeared, and I sorted through his simple belongingstwo Tshirts, a pair of boxer shorts, and a thin sweater. Not much, I chuckled, and no warm jumper. Typical motherly neglect. I soaked the clothes in a basin and turned to bake a cherry pie.
A cry erupted outside. I bolted to the door, flour still clinging to my hands. Whats happened? I demanded.
Victor wailed, clutching his leg. A goose pecked me. It hurts! Tears streamed down his face.
Why were you near them? They were grazing over there, I asked, seeing the red mark on his shin. I just wanted to watch them, he sniffed.
Did you never see geese before? I asked, surprised.
I have, but I never went close, he whispered.
Alright, lets get you inside, Ill apply some ointment, I said, taking his hand.
After dinner I tucked him onto the sofa and lay awake, the nights events replaying. How did my life become such a tangle? Id never have sent my own grandson to a strangers house. Yet here I was, sorting through his tiny clothes, soaking them, and baking pies.
Suddenly I heard a soft whimper. I leaned closer and heard a boys sobbing. I whispered, Whats wrong, love? Dont you like staying with me? I promised, Give it a month, and Mum will come back for you.
He lifted his head, eyes red, and whispered, She wont. I heard Uncle Victor say theyll send me to a boarding school when they return. Only on holidays will they see me. I dont want that; I was happy with Mum. Uncle Victor never calls me by my name. Grandmother, youre kind, but Im not needed. He burst into louder cries.
My heart clenched. I embraced his thin frame. Dont cry, Victor dear. I wont let anyone hurt you. Ill speak to your mother; you can stay with me. We have a good school and caring teachers. Well go mushroompicking, pick berries, milk the cows. Youre small now, but a good dose of fresh milk will make you strong. Dont believe me? Tomorrow Ill introduce you to Paul, a sturdy lad whos as solid as a biscuit. Want that?
He hugged my neck, I want. Will you keep your word?
I kissed his crown gently, Of course.
Years slipped by. Eleanormy sistersometimes visited, bringing small gifts, but always hurried off as Victors brother-inlaw, Victor, pressed her out the car. Nicholas appeared now and then. Mabel learned of Victor and blamed me, not my husband, for the boys existence, saying she didnt want real grandchildren, only oddities.
I cared little for her judgement. The frail boy grew into a sturdy young man. Every morning I prepared his favourite dishes, glancing out the window, hoping to catch a glimpse of him. One day a young soldier entered the house, calling softly, Grandma, Im here, where are you? I rushed to him and embraced his neckVictor, my beloved grandson!
Are you going back to Mother? I asked. He set his fork down, surprised, Which mother? The one who abandoned me and only brings trinkets once a year? No, I wont go. You are my mother now, and thats not up for debate. He calmly resumed his meal.
I brushed away a tear, grateful for this grandsona source of comfort and aid in my old age. My dear, sweet Victor.
