Dear Diary,
I shuffled into the West End clinic with a badly twisted ankle, the pain making each step feel like I was walking on broken glass. Just as I managed to steady myself, a bald chap breezed past me, cutting in line and disappearing right into the doctors office before I could even blink. Exhausted, I collapsed onto a chair, muttering under my breath, Typical mennever give way! A woman nearby overheard and chuckled, Hes been here earlier today, still cant find the right prosthetic. She laughed louder, Good lad, Andrew Clarke, my neighbour. Lifes never been kind to himlost his leg up to the knee, his wife left him, and hes got no children. At that moment a slightly limping man emerged from the consulting room, smiled, winked at me and the woman, and called out, Whats the plan, ladies? Lets keep on living! before strolling out.
I smirked at the ladies commentthose days were long gone for me. I married early, my husband twelve years my senior. By the stars we were both Dogs, and Paul, a true dog lover, soon brought home a large black Labrador named Rex. Not long after, I discovered I was pregnant.
Friends gushed, You have the perfect lifeflat in Chelsea, a car, a cottage in Kent, a dog, and a baby on the way. At six months, though, I suffered a miscarriage and our son never saw the light of day. Paul tried to console me, then said, Were not that young any more, but we still have Rex. I adored the dog; Paul entered countless dog shows with him, yet a dog could never replace a child.
At one of those shows Paul met Olivia Hart, who also owned a dog. He soon told me, Olivia and I are expecting; shes young and will have a healthy baby. Youre getting on a bit, arent you? Olivia was nearly twenty years younger than Paul, and it seemed the universe was stacked against me. I felt my own years slipping by faster than a London rainstorm. Retirement is just around the corner, Paul would say, as if I, too, were on the brink.
One afternoon I thought, Im only fortythree, not that old, but I feel like an old woman inside. A week later, the ankle sprain had almost healed and I returned to the clinic, only to run into that same bald man again.
Excuse me, miss, please go ahead of meI cut in without waiting, he said with an apologetic grin. When I left the doctors room, he lingered by the door.
Next! shouted the nurse.
Theyre calling you, I heard him say, surprised I hadnt followed him inside.
Im Andrew, he continued, and you must be Emily Turner? A lovely name for a brighteyed girl. May I escort you? Im a bit of a cripple myself, you see. I replied, If Im the pretty one, youre certainly not a model of disability.
He suggested we stop at a small café down the street. Good tea, cheap biscuitsmy treat, I havent had breakfast yet. Our conversation flowed easily, and he soon asked me out again, which I didnt refuse.
One day Im scared someone will overtake me at the next corner and Ill be left behind, Andrew confessed one morning, Im lame, bald, and youre a beautiful young woman! He paused, then blurted, Emily, marry me! Dont worry about how little we know each other; I want to spend the rest of my life discovering you. I have a flat, a steady job, Im a strong man. He looked at me earnestly, then lowered his head, as if expecting a refusal. He muttered, These days everyone wants a healthy, rich partner, not a cripple.
I laughed, Andrew, youre impossible, but Ill say yes! Astonishingly, after the wedding I fell pregnant almost immediately. I never imagined I could have a child again; I had long thought my life was marked by loss. Yet happiness rushed in, making me feel young, beautiful, and cherished once more.
Look at our little Sasha, his curls! I marveled.
Whats there to marvel at? Andrew ran a hand over his smooth, bald scalp, I was once a blond eaglehaired fellow, now Im this bald, lopsided man, and here we are with a son who has Mums eyes and Dads curls. He laughed heartily.
I cant get enough of Sasha, I said, leaning on his shoulder, Its as if this child never belonged to us before we met. If we hadnt crossed paths, none of this would exist. Tears welled up and I sobbed, surprising Andrew, who stammered, Emily, stop youre my dear, its all right! Look at Sashahow could he not be here? Im convinced he was meant to be born. We didnt meet by accident; Id have vanished without you. I brushed away my tears, pressed tighter to him, and whispered, Im crying from sheer joy. My lashes sparkled with droplets like tiny diamonds. For the first time in my life I wept from happiness, feeling both rich and content.
Children truly are the greatest wealth, and love is the ultimate happiness.
Lesson learned: No matter how broken or battered you feel, life can still hand you a fresh startif youre willing to let it.
