Youre not my mother! Leave Dad and me alone! Go away!
Every girl who ever thought of sharing a bed, a loaf of bread and a foldout sofa with Antony has heard those words. Little Poppy hisses viciously, flinging plush rabbits, sometimes even sharp bits of plastic, whenever a stepmomtobe crosses the threshold of their cramped council flat. You should take your hysterical teen to a therapist, she snarls, or shell grow up into another nightmare, spitting foam at everyone. The last woman in Antonys life says this as Poppy smashes a guestgifted dove statue against the wall. Sorry, please forgive me. I didnt think shed throw it Antony apologises, sweeping the trembling head and tail of the dove into a dustpan. I warned you she could never recover from her mothers death
Listen, I just lost my dog too, but Im not screaming like a madwoman or throwing things!
A dog? You compare losing a mother to a dog?!
I loved her. Now, all right, get out, you bunch of weirdos.
Sniffing something foul, the girl twists the key hard, then the other way. She slams the door so loudly the lights on four floors flick on in response to the sound.
Darling, why are you doing this? Its been almost four years; dont you see I cant cope alone? Antony kneels before his daughter.
Dont worry, Ill help you. That aunt isnt needed; shes bad, all of them are, Poppy whispers, hugging Antonys neck.
Each day Antony retreats further into himself. The cold October wind feels like it blows all year, until one day a woman named Eve warms his heart. She not only warms his heart but also his thighs, spilling half her coffee on him in the Underground. She then steps on his foot three times and, for good measure, flicks an umbrella at his eye. All of this happens after a thousand apologies.
Just in case. You never know if youll break your nose or sit on something painted, Eve says, pulling out a second pack of wet wipes and dabbing Antonys trousers.
Does this happen to you often? she asks.
Occasionally, she answers without thinking.
After that first coffee in the tube, Antony invites Eve for a second, then a third. She turns out to be a walking magnet for idiotic mishaps: a bus door nearly crushes her, a neighbours cat scratches half her face, and she wins every fine for jaywalking as if she were an Olympic champion. Surprisingly, Eve doesnt notice any of this; such chaos feels normal to her, and she never gets angry or upset. Thats why Antony is completely smitten, like a seventhgrader with a crush.
Listen, when we get home, dont mind her jokes. Shes good, really. I just dont know how to reach her. And all these women Im to blame, but
Calm down, breathe deeper, Eve rubs Antonys hand as they reach the entrance. We dont have to go to your flat. How about we meet here, on the street?
On the street? Antony is puzzled.
Yes, you said she gets nervous at home, so lets meet outside. And my shoes smell of cats, Eve admits shyly. The neighbour asked me to watch her Maine Coon, but it doesnt like me, she adds with a smile.
Dont worry. Ill bring her over. Antony slides his intercom card, and as the door buzzes open, he rushes inside.
Eve is aimlessly browsing the net when, from behind, a voice asks:
Is this your wallet?
Oh! Eve jumps, turning to see a girl about seven or eight holding her wallet stuffed with cash, cards and a prescription. Thank you, I almost lost it, Eve smiles.
You should be more careful, the girl remarks, rubbing her nose.
Agreed. Why are you here alone?
Im not. Im with Granddad and Oleg, the girl points to an elderly man tinkering under the bonnet of a black foreign car, while a boy of the same age holds a toolbox.
A parcel drops from a nearby postbox onto Eves shoulder.
Oh, a flying rat left a present for you, the girl giggles.
Just everyday life, Eve shrugs, pulling a pack of wipes from her bag. And its not a rat. Its a pigeon.
Granddad says its a rat.
Rats cant deliver mail to angels, can they?
Angels?
Pigeons used to be postmen, delivering letters to the sky. Eve says so convincingly that a few pigeons overhead perk up.
The girls head tilts.
What if they deliver to ordinary people instead of angels?
Why not? Just give the right postcode.
You dont
Before she can finish, the intercom buzzes and Antony appears.
There you are! You vanished and said nothing. I thought youd been kidnapped. Antony grabs the girl and lifts her.
Granddad called, you didnt answer. Did you see the note?
I saw it, I saw it. Meet Eve, Antony introduces the new girl. And this is Poppy, he nods toward the girl.
Poppys expression hardens, her stare burning at Eve. The next halfhour drifts in an awkward silence, conversations stumbling, tension hanging thick in the air.
Sorry, Antony says as he leaves with his daughter.
Its fine, Eve whispers barely audible.
A week later Eve passes Antonys block and spots Poppy hiding behind a bench.
Hey. What are you doing?
Catching pigeons, Poppy replies, eyes fixed on a grey bird pecking at mouldy bread. Oh, you she mutters, turning toward Eve.
How do you plan to catch it? Eve asks, ignoring the fierce look.
With my hands.
Youll catch very little that way. You need a net.
Where will I get one? Poppy looks at her as if shes clueless.
I can bring one.
You?
Yeah, why not? Wait here, feed it, Ill be back from Kids World and back.
Poppy cant answer before Eve darts off to the bus stop. She returns forty minutes later with a huge net and a bag of sunflower seeds.
Better to use more bait from the start, raise the odds, Eve says, scattering half the bag on the pavement outside the block. Poppy nods silently.
Within five minutes a grey cloud of pigeons descends, landing with a clatter and forming a flock.
Your turn, Eve hands over the net.
Poppy darts from behind the bench, throws the net over the flock, and it instantly scatters.
Got it! Got it!
Great, now the letter! Eve pulls a pigeon from the net.
I havent even written yet
What then? What do we do with it? Eve looks at Poppy, Poppy at Eve, the bewildered pigeon perched at a threehundredfortydegree angle.
Why did you bring this here? The pavement is now a mess of droppings, growls a cleaning lady like a kettle about to boil.
Lets go home, Eve nudges the girl toward the entrance. Dad home? she asks as they climb the stairs.
Yeah. Should I say you came? Eve offers.
No need, she smiles, noticing the childs sadness and distrust. Were here for other reasons. Write the letter; Ill wait for you on the landing.
Poppy smiles and disappears into the flat. She returns five minutes later with a rolledup piece of paper and a thread in her hands.
Shh Eve places a finger to her lips, pointing at the pigeon perched on the window. Poppy nods, eyes glittering with excitement.
Eve holds out a hand with seeds; the pigeon pecks cautiously, one after another. When the bird finally lets its guard down, Eve tries to catch it, but the pigeon darts fasterthough not smarter. Instead of flying out, it swoops straight at Eve, shrieking. Its wings beat her eyes, claws rake her, and she darts around the stairwell trying to shake it off. Neighbours start to peek out, laughter and curses filling the hallway.
For the next ten minutes Eve wipes herself and half the landing with wet wipes. The pigeon finally escapes through the window and never trusts people again. Poppy disappears behind a flat door, returning with a bucket of water and a mop.
Thatll be quicker, she says, smacking the floor with the mop. The air smells of wet stone.
Poppy, where are you going? Antonys face appears in the doorway, looking bewildered at his daughter and Eve scrubbing the hallway floor. Whats happening?
Dont ask too many questions, Eve winks.
Yeah, Dad, you dont need to know everything, Poppy mutters.
Alright, I get it, Antony shuts the door.
You know, I wondered why were catching these pigeons. There are proper pigeon lofts with professional postal birds, not freelance freeloaders, Eve says once the cleaning is done.
Seriously? Why didnt you say that before?
I just forgot. I havent sent a letter to the sky in ages.
Can we visit them? Please! Poppy jumps up, eager.
We can, but only tomorrow. Ill swing by after work, okay?
Yay! she squeals.
That evening Eve calls Antony and explains everything.
Do you think its a good idea? When she grows up and finds out, she might hold a grudge for this deception.
If Id been told the truth from childhood, I probably wouldve lost my mind.
Youre right. Will you be there tomorrow without me?
Yes, I think well manage. Besides, shes bright; Id love to talk to her.
Thanks.
The next day Eve picks up Poppy, and they jump into a taxi heading for the pigeon loft.
Wow, theyre so white and beautiful, Poppy coos, staring at the birds. Can I pick any? Will it deliver my letter to the right person? Wont it get lost? Do they have GPS? I need a letter to reach my mum, please. she pesters the keeper.
The important thing is to write the correct postcode, Eve reminds her.
I wrote our home address; its duplicated, right? And I added whos writing so the angels dont mix it up, Poppy says seriously.
Eve hands the keeper a few pounds, and they tie the letter to a pigeons leg before releasing it skyward.
Im not sorry, the man mutters, wiping tears from his sleeve as he secures the money and closes the cage.
Two days later Antony calls.
Poppy says she got a reply from the sky, and its about you. Want to read it?
Of course, Ill be there soon.
The news shakes Eve so much she asks to leave work early, and in her rush she deletes the project shed been working on all day. She rushes to the right floor, rings the bell, and Antony opens the door.
Poppy is out playing with the neighbours boy in the courtyard. She left a letter on the table, probably too shy to hand it over herself.
Eve steps inside, picks up a crumpled sheet scribbled in childish handwriting, full of errors and corrections:
Thank you, dear, for the letter. I miss you a lot and love you. I think about you and Dad every day. I saw Eve; shes nice. She isnt your mum, but you could be friends. Id like that. Your mum.
Eve swallows a lump, barely curses as the ink blurs from her tears.
Looks like she understood, Antony says, coming from behind and hugging her.
Eve only nods, still unable to stop sobbing.
I always thought I needed to find her a mother, but she just needed a friend, because she already has a mum.
I never wanted to claim more than that, Eve sighs, then notices a pigeon perched outside the window, staring straight at them as if eavesdropping, ready to fly up again to tell the angels what has happened.
