Emily! Em, James shouted from across the road.
Emily let out a heavy sigh, set the grocery bags on the curb and paused. She glanced at the car belonging to her exhusband parked on the opposite side, sucked in her cheeks, and lowered her eyes. How tired she was of this. James sprinted toward her, nearly tripping, eager to help.
Hey, Em, he said, catching the bags.
Hello, she replied.
I was just passing by, saw you struggling with those heavy bags and thought Id lend a hand, he said with a weak smile. Come on.
How can you be passing by? You live on Oakfield, and thats a suburb
James had already turned toward his car, two bags in his hands.
My mate gave me a lift from work, and then I saw you couldnt just drive past. Ill give you a ride home.
Im only a quartermile from here.
No problem, Ill take the heavy bags. Hows little Oliver, Mum?
Great, pick him up this weekend and youll hear everything. You call every day anyway, Emily muttered, trailing James more than her groceries. Why do you keep asking about me?
Just being interested. Were not strangers, are we? James said, opening the passenger door for his former wife.
Ill sit in the back.
No, its a mess in there. Dont.
Emily opened the rear door, peeked inside indeed, the boot was overflowing.
You still dont trust me?
She sighed and slipped into the front seat. James stowed the bags in the boot, beamed at Emily, who turned away, staring out the window at the familiar neighbourhood.
You look fine, as always, he said.
James, just drive me home. I still have to cook dinner, Emily snapped.
Right, right! James revved the engine and they pulled away. Ive landed a new job, sorting paperwork for a shiftwork contract, he blurted, while Emily kept her gaze fixed on the passing houses. Oliver said youve moved out of your motherinlaws place?
Hes been three years without you, Emily replied, unmoved.
Emily, stop playing hideandseek! Why do I only see our son when Im with you? Are you hiding your address? Let me drop you off.
No, thanks, Emily muttered, rubbing the edge of her coat. I bought groceries for my mum.
Just hand them over and Ill take you home, James said.
They stopped in a driveway.
What did Oliver say? I told him not to. Are you still seeing each other?
Just fine, Emily replied.
Why the hell do you need me? she snapped, losing patience.
Emily, were not strangers we have a son, James reached for her hand. She pulled it back into her pocket with disgust.
James, enough! How many accidental visits can I endure? Stop calling my mother, stop begging her to talk to me it wont help! We moved out because you were a nightmare. Im on the brink of a nervous breakdown, everyone keeps saying youre sorry, you miss us, you want the family back.
And Oliver? Why are you dragging him into this? Hes just getting used to seeing his dad on weekends, and you tell him well reconcile, you ask him to pass on greetings, you pry about my work hours, where Im after work, everything.
Im worried, too about our son! How many times can you keep pressuring him through me?
Emily slammed the car door, tried to pull the bags from the boot, but the latch was stuck. She yanked at it, cursing, desperate to be rid of James. Her mothers eyes watched from the upstairs window behind the blinds. James finally opened the boot and dragged the bags to the curb, but Emily stopped him.
No, Ill do it myself.
Emily, I still love you! Id give up everything for you. Want me to quit the shift work? Return to my old job? Get you a car? Walk everywhere? Itll be easier for you and Oliver, you could even pick him up from karate.
No, she snapped, snatching the bags from his grasp. I actually wish youd go far away, find a woman you love, live happily, and leave me alone.
Emily, forgive me, it was a mistake, she meant nothing to me! I still curse myself, he cried.
Forgiven, James. I forgave you long ago, but you wont let go of me.
I cant! Life without you is unbearable, James shouted as Emily climbed the stairs.
James, stop with the theatrics. Ive forgiven you, but I cant love you again, a voice echoed from above. The door on the second floor slammed shut and silence fell. James clenched his fists, retreated to his car, staring at the windows of his exmotherinlaws flat. How foolish hed been, swapping his wife, son, and home for a fleeting fling. After a year alone, he finally realised there was no one like his Emily, no one he could love like his son, Oliver.
Theyd met at school; Emily transferred into their form ten and outshone every girl. James only saw her; everyone else faded. Summer holidays cooled his restless heart, he spent the break at his grandmothers, fell for another girl who seemed to eclipse the sun.
When September came, Emily no longer excited him. They drifted into friendship, lost touch for five years while studying elsewhere, then remet in the same social circle, older. Emily earned a firstclass degree, landed a job at the factory where her mother worked. James, never settling, bounced between apprenticeships, finally taking a position on the production line, but his ambitions gnawed at him.
Everything changed when Emily told him she was pregnant. James panicked, grabbed her, introduced her to his parents, they married, Oliver was born, they bought a house with a mortgage that the grandparents helped clear early. Summers were spent at the seaside, birthdays, christenings, weekend trips, family gatherings. James grew restless, craving recognition at work, but the corporate ladder was a tangled maze. He switched jobs, made dubious deals with a former colleague for promotions, which only led to more emptiness.
Emily, seeing his burnout, urged him to take a break, even suggested he take Oliver with him. James refused, but finally agreed to spend a couple of days at a friends place in Brighton for fishing. He never made it to the lake; his friends wife sent a polite note asking him to stay out of their lives, likening him to a dog on a short leash.
Emily packed her things, Oliver, and left for her mothers house. When James demanded where she was, she sent him crude photos from his fishing trip. He raced after her, only to find the door locked, his motherinlaws stare burning him. He waited for the divorce papers, fought the proceedings, begged Emily for forgiveness, but she signed.
A year later, seeing James trying to help, paying child support, calling Oliver every weekend, even winning back his motherinlaws favour, Emilys mother urged her to forgive. Emily eventually did, but the spark was gone, the wounds had scarred over into cold memories.
Finally, Emily walked into the kitchen with her groceries; her mother had brewed tea, the house smelling of fresh scones.
Whos tormenting who now? her mother asked, barely hearing the front door.
Who? Emily replied. Has Oliver been home from school?
No.
Hes driving me mad, Mum! If only hed be off on a shift somewhere far away! He stalks me, I cant think about any new relationship, not knowing what James will do.
Emily set the bags down, the kettle whistling. Emily, you cant keep doing this. You have a son.
How can I? It feels like Im living in a bed with a stranger. Im exhausted.
So why give him hope, keep in touch? her mother said, unpacking the groceries, avoiding eye contact.
He wont leave me alone! He shouted at our IT guy last month, I even flirted a bit, and now he wants me to forgive him. What am I supposed to forgive? Hes not even there.
He wont let you go, you need someone else, her mother said calmly. Men like James cant handle betrayal.
What? Which betrayal? Weve been divorced three years, he means nothing to me.
He cant release you.
Exactly, enough!
James kept calling, waiting for his new job paperwork. He lingered at Emilys office during lunch breaks, phoning Oliver, asking him to tell his mother theyd still be together. The exmotherinlaw stopped answering. Weeks later James met Emily and Oliver at school early morning.
Emily, Im leaving, James said.
Good luck, Emily replied.
Oliver, Daddys going far, but not for long, James said, looking at his exwife who turned away. You got nothing to say?
Oliver tugged at his mothers sleeve; his first lesson was English, punctuality mattered.
Ive said everything. Glad youre changing your scenery, hope it helps you. James tried to smile.
Dont count on it, I wont abandon you!
James knelt, hugged Oliver tightly, then turned to Emily, who stepped back. He clenched his teeth and walked to the car.
Ill forgive you, Emily, he shouted from the roadside, but Ill never forgive the betrayal.
Emily laughed bitterly, thinking hed finally let her go.
Three months of calm passed; Emilys eyes no longer fluttered at the sight of a blue sedan parked down the street. She roamed the town freely, no longer fearing a coincidental runin with James. She met a friend for coffee, but the friend kept urging her to save the marriage, to love James. Emily cut her off, suspecting James of manipulation. The friend, herself divorced, knew the grind of raising a child alone, often forgiving her own ex for trivial things, like finding a stray hairdryer in the car and joking about it.
Can we pop the champagne? Sarah, the friend, smiled. Heres to new beginnings, she winked.
Dont forget the hundred calls a day from James, Emily sighed, scanning the menu.
Youd better move on, get out, youre still young, still look good, Sarah leaned over the table, whispering. Hes only looking at you, she added, smiling.
Emily blushed, turned, and met a bold man who introduced himself, offered coffee. The ladies declined, but his charm lingered.
Soon Emily met Mark, a tidylooking man, exchanged numbers, and began texting. She stopped reading Jamess endless messages, but her phone buzzed constantly, and she smiled at each new notification. She hurried home from work, as if someone awaited her.
Hey, Oliver, hows it going?
Fine, Dad, I got a five on my English test! the boy chirped.
Oliver, hows mum? James interjected, his voice eager.
Shes fine, changed her haircut, we were at Lilas birthday yesterday
Good. She never answers my calls, never reads my messages, James muttered, trying to sound interested. Put her on the phone, please.
Mom cant come right now, we have guests.
Who?
Uncle Mark.
What the hell, uncle?! James barked. Hand her the phone now.
Mom! Mom! Oliver shouted from his room. In the kitchen, laughter and the smell of something baking filled the air, while a hammer clanged in the next room as Mark worked on a shelf. Mum! Oliver yelled again, Dads calling.
Emily entered the kitchen, fixing her apron, peeking through the open doorway.
Yes, she said, taking the call, eyes drifting toward the warm light spilling from the stove.
Whats up, Em? Getting tangled in men again? James teased.
And you, stop being a pest, Emily replied dryly. Calling again?
What gives you the right? You have a son! How dare you! Ill come over and give you a honeymoon youll never forget, you slag.
Finally something broke, Emily laughed. Ive been waiting for the day the man who swapped his family for a fling finally shows up. When will you understand were nothing to each other?
Dammit, youre a James shouted into the handset, Ill be back in a week, I I
Emily, I did what you asked, a male voice from the hallway said. Are you home? Oliver and I want dinner, the smell from the oven is killing us. Right, Oliver?
The boy nodded, reaching for his phone, his voice echoing with a mix of panic and excitement.
Whats that? Mark asked, reaching for the handset.
Emily handed him the phone; the screams abruptly stopped as James hung up.
Dad will call later, Emily said, glancing at her upset son.
James never called Oliver again, but he kept harassing his exmotherinlaw, insulting her for raising such a daughter. He even wrote to Sarah, threatening to break her bones. James never returned from his first assignment, stayed on the second, then vanished somewhere across the country, chasing a phantom career. He thought of Oliver twice a year birthdays, New Years but never wrote. Emily now lives with Mark; Oliver, for a while, missed his fathers calls, but Mark and he found plenty in common, like the strict British curriculum Olivers school taught, which Mark enjoyed reciting.
The story ends with Emily walking down a quiet London street, the sky turning amber, the weight of the past finally lifting as she steps into a future of her own choosing.
