12 March 2024
Ive been thinking a lot about how quickly Ive become the only one looking out for Emma. Her cousin Charlottemy stubborn secondcousinkeeps dragging her into endless moneylending.
Emma, please! Dont leave me, Charlotte begged one evening, clutching at my sisters arm. If you go, I cant keep Ilya on his feet. Ive got no cash, no job, and you earn a decent wage Just lend me a tenner, I swear Ill pay you back later.
Emma had never been close to Charlotte. Their mother had abandoned them years ago, and the two never mended the rift caused by a longstanding family feud. Emma always felt shortchanged because of it. She pulled herself up, earned a degree on her own, and eventually bought a flat near the city centre, taking on a mortgage to secure her own roof.
Emma works tirelessly, never shying away from extra tasks. She often brings projects home, sacrificing weekends to finish reports. Charlotte, on the other hand, prefers lavish holidays and lives largely off mens generosity, regularly borrowing from Emma until her next payday. At first Emma didnt see anything wrong with that.
One night my phone buzzed. The caller ID read Charlotte.
Hey, Emma! Hows it going?
Hey, all good. Working as usual. You?
Charlotte exhaled dramatically.
Listen, Ive got a problem. My landlord just hiked the rent and I need £500 straight away or Ill be out on the street.
Emma froze.
What? Why did he raise it?
He says prices everywhere are up. Can you help me out?
Emma hesitated, thinking of the holiday savings shed set aside.
Charlotte, Im saving for a break
Please, Emma! Ill pay you back in a couple of days. A handsome bloke promised me some cash, and Ill return the loan.
Charlotte, Im putting money aside for a trip, and
Can you wait a few days? Please, Im begging you!
Emma sighed.
Fine but only for a few days. I dont want my holiday to go off the rails because of your irresponsibility.
Thank you! Do you have my card details?
Emma sent the money, and the repayment never came.
Three months later, steeled by the experience, Emma called Charlotte.
Charlotte, how are you?
Oh, Emma, Im fine. What did you want?
Emma felt a wave of shame.
Remember the money you borrowed? I need it back. My phones broken, I cant take client calls, and I need a new one. Im short on cash.
Charlotte snorted.
Emma, a new phone for half a grand is a bit much. Maybe look for something cheaper?
Emma tried to explain.
The tech is pricey these days, and I need something reliable for work, so I can run the software I use.
Emma, Im in a pricey rented place now, bills are through the roof. I cant give you anything at the moment.
But you promised
I remember, I remember! As soon as I sort my finances, Ill pay you back, I swear!
Emma, recalling the previous letdown, let out a heavy sigh. After a few more polite requests and the usual excuses, she finally accepted the loss.
Months later Charlotte called again.
Emma, I need your help urgently!
What now?
Im broke, can you lend me something?
I told you Im tight. My quarterly bonus still hasnt arrived.
My wallets empty, Im hungry, I dont know what to think!
Did you see a doctor?
No time!
You havent worked for two months.
So what? Stop lecturing me, Emma. Just give me something.
Emma exhaled.
The most I can spare is £60.
£60? Are you kidding?
Thats all I have, Charlotte.
Fine, send it.
Emma tried to avoid Charlotte, but the cousin kept popping up like a bad penny.
Then Charlotte got pregnant. She was dating a promising single bloke and assumed the baby would secure her future. Emma didnt share that optimism. Over tea, Emma tried to voice her doubts.
Charlotte, maybe dont count on that lad so much?
Why not? He loves me!
Youve only known him a week. What child?
He loves me! Hell marry me once he knows about the baby.
I think youre being reckless. What if he doesnt marry you?
Hell support us, hes a decent man!
Better rely on yourself
Youre just jealous, Emma! Youve got no man. When the baby arrives, everything will be fine.
A few months later Charlotte burst into Emmas flat, tears streaming.
He he he left me!
Who left you?
The man.
He said the baby isnt his. He claimed there are plenty of women like him and threatened me if I tried to blackmail him.
I told you
Dont say anything! Im already in a mess. What do I do now?
Charlotte if youre not sure you can manage, maybe consider terminating the pregnancy?
Charlotte flew into a rage.
What are you saying?! Its five months! I delayed everything so hed think I wasnt after money! Where do I put him now?
You said youre scared you cant cope. What will you live on? No job, no cash. Hes walked out, and your father wont take responsibility.
Enough, Ill give birth and see what happens. Maybe Ill write a letter, maybe hell change his mind. Can you lend me some money for the first weeks? The doctors fees and vitamins are expensive, and Im broke.
Emma opened her banking app.
Charlotte later collected her son from the hospital and immediately began leaning on Emma for everything, even the smallest chores, always under the pretext of for the baby. She would call from dawn till dusk:
Emma, can you pop to the shop? Ive run out of milk and Oliver is crying.
Its nine at night, cant you go yourself? The shops just down the road.
I cant, my backs killing me, I can barely crawl. And I dont feel like dressing Oliver.
Emma sighed.
Fine, but thats the last time.
Thanks, love! Also grab a pack of nappies, oat milk, a few chicken breasts, and some sausages. Ill be waiting.
When Oliver fell ill, Charlotte would ring at midnight demanding Emma fetch medicine from the outofhours pharmacy.
Emma, Olivers got a fever! I need something right away!
What? We were just talking a few hours ago!
I dont know, hes screaming, cant breathe. My paediatrician told me to get a specific antipyretic from the nightshift pharmacy.
Are you serious? No examination, just the paediatrician said so? Call an ambulance!
No, the ambulance will just take him to the hospital and leave us there. The paediatrician sells these fancy supplements, Ill tell you what to buy, just bring it.
This is too much, why should I be driving across town at this hour?
But hes crying! You dont want anything to happen to him, do you?
Emma swallowed her irritation.
Alright, Ill be there, but this is the final warning.
Every personal request from Charlotte, even the mundane ones, was framed as essential for the child. Emma fed, dressed, and medicated Oliver for over a year and a half.
The last straw came when Charlotte asked for a new dress and shoes for Oliver.
Emma, I need a new dress and Oliver needs shoes.
Charlotte, thats enough! I cant keep doing this. I have my own life!
What do you mean, enough? Whos going to help me now? Do you want my child to starve and go naked?
I want you to take responsibility for your own life and your child. I wont keep supporting you.
You selfish thing! You only think of yourself! What am I supposed to do now?!
Do whatever you like, but without me.
Emma hit the delete button, changed her number, and finally breathed a sigh of relief. The next morning she walked into the office, changed her contact details, and felt a weight lift. Now I have to look at how I ended up here and what I learned.
Lesson: No matter how much you love family, you must draw the line when their reliance turns into exploitation. Only by respecting my own limits can I truly be there for those who genuinely need me.
