Everyones invited to Mums jubilee except you, announced my sister in the family WhatsApp group.
Enough, Mum! I cant be travelling to you every week. I have a life of my own!
Emily pressed the phone to her ear, feeling the anger rise. It was the third call that day, the same complaints over and over.
Emily, whats this? Lucy was here yesterday with a cake. And you havent called all week!
Mum, I called the day before yesterday! And I bring a cake, just not every single day.
Thats exactly the point not every day. Lucy does it every week. Thats what a daughter should do.
Emily closed her eyes and counted to ten. The arguments never ended. My older sister Lydia had always been Mums favourite, from the moment we were children.
Mum, I have an early shift tomorrow. Can we talk later?
Of course, youre always busy. Lucy also works, but she always finds the time.
Emily hung up without a goodbye. She was exhausted, fed up with the constant comparisons.
The phone buzzed again a new message in the family chat. Emily opened the app and saw a long post from Lydia:
Hi everyone! As you know, Mums 60th birthday is coming up. Im organising a dinner at The Oakley in Manchester. All relatives are invited. Ive booked a table for twenty. Please RSVP by Friday.
The list that followed named aunts, uncles, cousins and even a thirdcousin from York wed only met once. Emily scrolled to the bottom her name was missing.
She read the message again, hoping it was a mistake. It wasnt. Her name simply wasnt there.
She typed into the chat:
Lydia, am I invited?
The reply was instantaneous:
Everyones invited to Mums jubilee except you. Thats Mums decision.
Emily stared at the screen, the words blurring. She read it a second, a third time. Was it a joke? Had Lydia just been cruel?
No one else in the chat objected. Aunt Zara confirmed she would come. Cousin Sergei said hed arrive with his wife. No one asked why Emily was omitted.
Emily dialled Mum. One ring, two, three no answer. She then called Lydia.
Hello? Lydias voice was calm, almost indifferent.
Lydia, whats this? Why am I not on the guest list?
I told you. Mum doesnt want you there.
Why?
There was a pause.
She thinks youre a bad daughter, that you dont care about her.
Thats not true! I call, I visit, I help!
Apparently not enough, Lydia said, a hint of satisfaction in her tone. Mum said she doesnt want to see you at her party, and Im backing her up.
Youre backing her? Im your sister!
And thats why I know the truth about you selfish, only thinking of yourself.
What are you on about?
That youve lived your life the way you wanted. You left town when Mum needed help. You married Victor even though Mum objected. You had only one child, Alex, when Mum wanted grandchildren.
Emily could hardly believe what she was hearing.
Is this serious? I went to university! I got a degree! Is that a crime?
You could have studied here. There are universities in this city as well.
My specialty was there! Victor is a good man, Mum just cant accept it!
Thats exactly it nothing is right for Mum. You never listened, you always did the opposite.
My life, my choices!
And Mums too. If she doesnt want you at her jubilee, then thats that.
Lydia hung up. Emily stood in her oneroom flat, stunned. She wasnt invited to her own mothers birthday because, according to them, she was a bad daughter.
She sank onto the sofa, covering her face. Tears threatened, but she held them back. There was no time to weep; she needed to understand what was happening.
She dialled Mum again. This time Mum answered.
Emily, why are you calling? Lydias handling everything, dont worry.
Mum, why wasnt I invited?
There was a heavy sigh.
Sweetheart, you know why. You hardly ever call, hardly ever visit. It hurts.
Mum, I live three hundred miles away! I cant be there every week!
But Lucy lives right here! Shes half an hour away by car!
Exactly, shes nearby. You chose to go away.
I didnt choose! My job, my family are here!
Thats your family, not mine. So Im not family.
Emily felt helplessness wash over her like a wave.
This is your jubilee, sixty years. How could I not be there?
Then you should have been a better daughter earlier.
I try to be a good daughter!
Trying isnt enough. Lucy does. Ive decided I want to spend my day with those who love and value me.
I love you!
Show it in actions, not words. Sorry, Emily, the decisions final.
Mum hung up. Emily clutched the phone, numb.
Victor returned home an hour later, eyes wide at his wifes redeyed face.
Emily, whats wrong?
She told him everything. Victor frowned, shook his head.
This is absurd! How can a mother exclude her own daughter?
Apparently you can.
What about your sister? How could she allow this?
Lydia has always been Mums sidekick. Theyve been in sync since we were kids. Im the extra.
Victor sat next to her on the sofa.
Maybe its a misunderstanding?
No, its years of buildup.
Emily paced the room.
Ive always felt guilty for leaving, for marrying Victor against Mums wishes, for having only Alex instead of three grandchildren Mum wanted.
Emily, its your life. You had the right to choose.
Yes, but every choice costs something.
Victor put an arm around her shoulders.
Maybe its for the best. Skip the jubilee, save yourself the drama. Theyll just gossip behind your back, why waste your energy?
She thought about it. Perhaps not going would spare her pain. Yet it was her mother, her family she couldnt just walk away.
The next day she called Aunt Zara, who had always been kind to her.
Hello, Aunt Zara, its Emily.
Emily dear! How are you?
Did you see the chat about Mums jubilee?
Of course, Im sorting out a gift.
Did you notice I wasnt on the list?
A pause.
Yes, I was surprised, honestly.
Did you say anything?
She called, explained that you rarely visit, dont give Mum enough attention. Shes hurt.
Emilys grip tightened on the phone.
I live far away! I cant pop in every week!
I get it, love. But Lucy is close, she brings Mum groceries, helps around the house.
So Im a bad daughter because I live elsewhere?
No ones calling you a bad daughter. Mum just wants company. Shes lonely, its hard for her.
She has two daughters! I call, I visit when I can, I send money!
Money isnt the same as presence. She wants us nearby.
I cant just move back!
A sigh.
No ones demanding that. Just try to understand Mum. Shes sixty, shes aging, shes scared.
Isnt it unfair that Im blamed for living my own life?
It hurts, of course. Try talking to her calmly; maybe it can be sorted.
Emily ended the call, determined to try a calm conversation, though Mum never seemed to listen.
That evening a cousin, Olivia, messaged:
Emily, I saw youre not on the guest list. Is that true?
True. Mum doesnt want me there.
Thats madness! Youre her daughter!
Bad daughter, thats what she says.
What if I speak to Aunt Margaret? She might change her mind.
I dont know, try if you want.
Olivia later called.
I spoke to your Mum.
And?
Shes firm. She says shes tired of your indifference, that you abandoned her. Lydia backs her up. Theyre both set.
Should I call more often? Visit more?
Emily felt anger flare.
I call three times a week, visit once a monthandahalf. Thats all I can manage.
How many is enough? Every day? Move in?
I dont know. She just feels abandoned.
My guilt is for nothing. Enough.
She hung up, hands trembling. Everyone kept saying she wasnt calling enough, wasnt visiting enough, wasnt giving enough attention. What about her own feelings? Her life?
Alex, their sixteenyearold son, entered the room.
Mom, why are you so sad?
Just problems.
What kind?
Emily didnt want to burden Alex with family drama, but his concerned look made her speak.
Mum didnt invite me to her jubilee.
Alexs eyes widened.
Why not?
She thinks Im a bad daughter.
Thats nonsense! I call, I visit, I send money!
Apparently thats not enough.
He sat beside her on the sofa.
Maybe we should just skip it? If theyre all like that, why bother?
Its my Mum, Alex.
So what if she doesnt respect me? Does it matter?
She looked at him. His simple logic cut through the mess. She couldnt just give up; it was family, however tangled.
A week passed and Emily thought about the jubilee nonstop. She was angry, upset, crying. Victor tried to distract her, to support her, but the ache lingered.
Lydia posted in the chat:
Reminder: the jubilee is in a week. Anyone who hasnt RSVPd, please let me know. Need a final headcount.
Emilys name was still absent, as if she didnt exist.
She made one last attempt and drove to her hometown without warning, hoping to surprise Mum.
Mum opened the door, surprised.
Emily? What are you doing here?
Can I come in?
Mum let her in grudgingly. The flat looked the same the old couch, the carpet, family photos. This time a large picture of Lydia with her grandchildren dominated the wall.
Sit down, Mum nodded to the sofa. Tea?
Yes, please.
They sat in the kitchen, tea steaming between them.
Mum, I came to talk about the jubilee.
Mum set her cup down.
No need, Ive already decided.
Thats not right! Im your daughter!
Youre the daughter who left me.
I didnt leave! I went to study, work, live my own life!
And thats exactly why.
Emily felt the anger rise again.
Mum, I was twenty when I left. I had the right to build a life!
You had the right, but you could have chosen differently. Stay, marry someone here, have more children, be close.
Victor is a good man!
He took me away from you.
He didnt! We chose to live where his work is.
Mum waved her hand.
Its all the same. Youre far, Im struggling.
Lucys near.
Shes near because shes a good daughter. She cares for me.
I care too, in my own way!
Your care isnt enough.
Emily stood, shaking.
You know what, Mum? No matter what I do, itll never be enough because Im not Lydia. I chose my own path.
Thats the wrong path.
My path! And I had the right to it!
Mum also rose.
Fine, live your life. Ill have my jubilee with those who value me.
Alright, Emily gathered her bag. If thats how it is, I wont keep imposing myself. Live as you wish.
She left without looking back, tears streaming, untouched. She sat in the car, engine off, empty inside. She had tried, shed spoken, but Mum wouldnt hear.
Maybe it was time to let go.
Victor met her at the door, worried.
How did it go?
No luck. Shes firm.
Maybe its for the best? Youll be free of this guilt.
Maybe.
Emily collapsed onto the sofa, eyes closed. The guilt that had haunted her since she left home was finally easing.
The day of the jubilee arrived. While relatives gathered in Manchester, setting tables, exchanging gifts, Emily stayed at home, uninvited, feeling like an extra.
Victor suggested a night out, a distraction. Emily declined. She just wanted to lie still.
Later, photos flooded the family chat Mum at the banquet, smiling, Lydia by her side, relatives raising glasses.
Emily scrolled, feeling something tear inside. Everyone was there, except her.
She switched off her phone and fell asleep.
The next morning Aunt Zara called.
Emily dear, how are you?
Fine, Aunt Zara.
I was at the jubilee yesterday. Wanted to tell you
I saw the pictures.
Your Mum looked a bit sad, smiling through it. When everyone left, she broke down.
Emily sat up.
She cried? Why?
She said you werent there. She missed her favorite daughter.
I wasnt invited, so how could she expect me?
It seemed like a test. She hoped youd push through, prove your love.
Looks like a cruel test.
Lucy thinks it was nonsense. She even argued with Mum over it.
What happened then?
Mum realised shed messed up, that shed tried to manipulate you. Shes sorry now.
Emily shook her head.
Im tired of these games, these manipulations.
I get it, love. But know that Mum does miss you, she just cant show it right.
I wish shed learn.
Maybe she will.
She hung up, feeling both relief and lingering hurt.
A week later Lydia sent a private message:
Mum asks why you dont call.
Emily replied, Why? She doesnt want me.
Dont be childish. She just wants attention.
Got it. Whole jubilee without me.
Stop sulking. Call Mum, shes worried.
Let Lydia call. Shes the beloved daughter.
Lydia stopped replying.
A few days later Mum called.
Emily, why arent you calling?
So what? You said youd be with the ones who love you. I guess Im not one of them.
Emily, dont be angry.
Im not angry, Mum. I just live my life, as you wanted.
What did you want? For me to drop everything and move back? To be there every day like Lucy?
Mum was silent.
I wanted you to love me.
I love you! I just cant live the way you want!
Why?
Because thats my life! I have a husband, a son, a job! I cant abandon it.
Mum began to sob.
So Im not important to you.
Youre important, but not the only important thing. Thats okay.
Emily felt a mix of pity and anger.
Mum, Ill keep in touch, call, visit when I can. Not every day, not on demand. If thats not enough, speak to Lucy.
What if I need more?
Then youll have to ask Lucy. Im still your daughter, just not the one you expected.
Mum was quiet.
I didnt mean to hurt you with the jubilee.
But you did.
I thought youd come anyway, prove you still care.
If you want my attention, just ask. No need for tests.
Mum repeated, When you can, then.
Yes, when I can. Thats better than never.
Mum sobbed again, but Emily didnt fall for it.
Mum, I have to go. Think about what I said. If you can accept me as I am, call.
She hung up, hands trembling, yet calmer than before. Shed set her boundaries. The choice now lay with Mum.
Victor asked later, How did it go?
Talked. She knows where I stand. Shell decide.
Im proud of you.
Really?
Yes. You finally stood up for yourself.
Emily leaned into him, grateful. She finally felt sheAnd for the first time in years, Emily felt a quiet peace settle over her life.
