I’ve Always Dreamed of Stepping into My Brother’s Shoes, But Everything Soon Turned Upside Down

I always imagined myself in my brothers shoes, but everything soon turned upside down.
My mother became pregnant with me when she was eighteen. As soon as my father learned the news, he walked outhe didnt want a family, only endless parties and friends. My mothers parents, my grandparents, were livid. In a small town near Lille, having a child out of wedlock was a disgrace, and my grandfather drove my mother out, shouting, I never want to see such an irresponsible girl again! I cant even picture what she enduredso young, alone, a baby cradled in her arms. Yet she persevered: she enrolled in a correspondence university, secured a job, and threw herself into work. She was assigned a room in a boarding house, and the two of us began our life together. I had to grow up faster than other kidsshopping, cleaning, reheating meals. Playtime? There was none. From an early age, I became her pillar, her only man.
I never complained; I was proud of it. Then Victor entered our lives. I liked him: he brought chocolates, made my mother smile, took care of her. She glowed when he was near, and one day she told me, Victor and I are getting married and moving into a big house. I was thrilledI dreamed of a real father figure and hoped Victor would fill that role. At first everything seemed wonderful. I finally had my own space to rest, listen to music, read books. Victor helped my mother, his eyes sparkling with happiness.
Soon she announced she was expecting another child. Not long after, Victor told me, Youll have to move into the storage room. Thatll be the babys bedroom. I didnt understandwhy me when the house was huge? The next day my belongings were piled into a tiny corner that could only fit a single bed. It felt unfair, but I kept quiet, accustomed to bearing hardship.
When my little brother Michel was born, the nightmare truly began. His cries stole my sleep, leaving me wandering like a zombie. My school grades fell, teachers scolded me, and my mother shouted, You must be a role model for your brother! Stop embarrassing us, lazy one! As Michel grew, new duties piled onto metaking him to the park, pushing his stroller. Other kids teased me, I blushed with shame, yet I said nothing. Everything nicetoys, clotheswent to Michel. When I asked for anything for myself, Victor snapped, No money. I shuttled my brother to daycare and back, cooked, cleaned, and lived in the hope that he would outgrow me so I could finally be free.
When Michel started school, my mother ordered me to help with his homework. He was spoiled, demanding, and performed poorly; every time I tried to correct him, he complained to my mother. She always defended him, and I was reprimanded: Youre the older sibling; you must be more patient! He bounced from one school to another, failing each time. Eventually he was placed in a private school where poor grades were overlooked for money. I enrolled in a mechanic training programnot by choice, but to escape the household.
After that came distance learning and long hours of workday and nightsaving for my own place. I married, found peace. As for Michel, Victor gave him an apartment, yet he still lives with our parents, rents out the place and wastes money. He refuses to work, spending his days glued to the TV. One New Years Eve we gathered at my parents home. His latest girlfriend, Léa, was there, and I overheard their conversation in the kitchen.
Youre lucky to have your brother, she said to my wife, Marie. Stan is a real hardworker, responsible. Why isnt Michel? I ask him to move in, start a family, but he clings to his mother. The rent money does us no good.
Yes, Stan is wonderful, Marie replied, smiling. Forget about Michel; he doesnt deserve you. Hell never be a good husband.
I stood frozen. Michel swapped girlfriends as often as shirts, but none stayedmy mother drove each of them away, deeming them unworthy of her golden boy. He never resisted, living in his laziness like in a cocoon. Then I realized I no longer envied him. All the fantasies I hadbeing in his placewere empty air. Fate threw trials at me, but it also rewarded me. I have a family, a loving wife, a daughter, a home I built with my own hands. I am proud of who I am, and for the first time I rejoice that I am not Michel. My life is my hardwon, genuine victory.