So you mean he actually wants to come back? Emma asked, puzzled, after hearing her sons story. Its been almost fifteen years since weve been officially strangers after the divorce.
It does sound that way, James admitted, struggling to find the right words. I get that people make mistakes when theyre young, but theres nothing left to split now.
Theres nothing left for us either, the woman replied, exasperated. But you and Lucy are grownup adults with your own families. You decide who to see and who to ignore why am I even involved?
Father just realised you wouldnt want to hear him, so he asked his daughter and me to put in a word, James tried to justify it. It would be easier for Lucy and me if we knew you two were still living together and supporting each other.
Emma was still processing the conversation when her daughter called, launching straight into the same painful topic.
Mum, you have to understand, its our dad, and hes unwell now, Lucy explained.
When he was young and full of energy, he never even thought of me existing, and now suddenly everythings changed, Emma tried not to let her nerves show. Maybe youve forgotten he left me and you both for another woman years ago!
Theyve been split up for ages, and it would be nice if you two could live together now that youre both getting on in years, Claire pressed her point.
The talk with her children left Emma heavyhearted. She had given everything to the marriage, never tried to rebuild a new life after the split for fear of hurting them, since both had struggled with the separation that coincided with their teenage years. Now it seemed they were speaking different languages and barely hearing each other. A memory of the day George walked out resurfaced, making it all the worse.
You know, I dont love you any longer, he had said then, averting his eyes. Ive met someone else and want to spend the rest of my days with her.
What about the kids? Emma had asked, her voice trembling.
Youll carry on as before, just without me, he replied. The flat stays yours, Ill keep in touch with the children and help with money where I can, but I dont love you any more.
Did you ever think how theyd take your departure at this age? Emma could hardly believe it.
Theyll be fine, let them learn the ropes of adult life. It isnt right to live without love, sorry, he said, signalling the end of the conversation.
George stuck to his word. He didnt claim the house in the divorce and stayed with his new partner. He met the kids on neutral ground because he didnt have the courage to step back into the flat, and his new girlfriend never invited them over. Emma tried once to explain the reasons for the split to James and Lucy, but they didnt want the details.
Father told us it was his decision and asked us to respect it, James said, now sounding more mature. Its tough for Lucy and me, but eventually things will settle.
For Emma nothing seemed to settle on its own. She missed her exhusband, wept into her pillow at night, and turned down friends attempts to set her up with someone new. He only resurfaced in her life when he called about the kids.
Were planning a holiday, and I left the fishing gear on the loft before I went, George said over the phone. Can I pick it up on Saturday? I thought the kids could bring it, but they didnt understand where it was.
Fine, come by, Emma replied as calmly as she could.
She then spent the week counting down to Saturday, rehearsing the conversation in her head. She wanted to show George that she could thrive without him and had even thought of meeting him at the parade of his return, before deciding it would look a bit ridiculous and changing her mind.
Youve lost weight, she remarked as George packed his boxes. Does your new wife not feed you?
She does, I just work a lot, he muttered, unwilling to discuss his new life.
If you need, I can cook for you or pass on your favourite recipes, Emma blurted, aware of how absurd she sounded but unable to stop.
Sarcasm isnt your style, George sighed, weary. Were strangers now. Well always share the kids, maybe grandchildren, and thats it.
Are you sure about that? Emma asked, a flicker of hope in her voice.
Yes, he answered firmly.
He then left for his new wife, and Emma sat alone in the kitchen, crying for herself. In the year after the divorce she had lost a lot of weight, then fought to pull herself together. It wasnt easy; she pretended to be cheerful while secretly hoping George would have a change of heart and come back. She knew people would judge, but she was ready to take him back and forget the past.
Dad and his woman split up, three years later the children told Emma. Hes moved into a room in a student hall.
That news, oddly, gave her a sliver of hope for a possible reunion. Emma started dressing more sharply, looking after herself, and waited for his first move. Friends joked that shed sorted out her love life, but they didnt push for details, so she brushed them off with humour. She waited, George didnt return, and eventually he paired up with another woman. He even attended his sons wedding, while Lucy came alone.
Why did he come alone? Emma asked.
Irene was on a business trip, couldnt make it, but she sent her congratulations, he replied calmly.
With time Emma began to see things differently, stopped waiting, and found solace in her work and a cottage out of town. She filled her free moments with friends, family, flowers, and one day a stray cat she rescued. Life settled into a new rhythm until a sudden encounter with George at the lift, returning from work, jolted her again.
You know, I thought we should leave the bad stuff behind, he said, nursing a cup of tea in the kitchen. Most of our lives are behind us, the negativity has overgrown, and theres no point dwelling on it. Lets spend the rest of our days together and raise grandchildren.
Be honest, why come back to our flat instead of staying with any of your other partners? Emma asked, dropping the pretense of cheerfulness.
My health isnt what it used to be; Im retiring next year, George answered plainly. I figured the kids are good to us, they wont abandon you and will even fetch a glass of water in old age.
Do you remember telling me we were strangers? she said, looking into his eyes. I only understood it later, and now I fully agree.
So you wont take me back? he asked.
Dont worry, you said the kids are good, theyll never ditch you, Emma replied. You crossed me out of your life years ago; let it stay that way.
George left again, and Emma settled back into her favourite armchair. She switched off her phone, knowing he would soon call the children and they would start peppering her with questions. All she wanted now was quiet and peace. She had waited so long for his return that the hope finally burned out. Had he said he wanted to grow old together, perhaps she would have taken him back. But he was only thinking of his own comfort, and no one was there to console Emma. She still had her children, friends, the cottage, and the cat and that, for the moment, felt more than enough.
