Ill make the call, he muttered, edging toward the door.
Your lover rang. She sends her regards, Irene threw out, never taking her eyes off the hob where something familiar sizzled in a pan, as ordinary as the life theyd built together.
Andrew froze on the kitchen threshold. Twentyfour yearsan entire lifeflashed before him in a heartbeat. The keys slipped from his grasp, clattered onto the floor with a harsh metallic clang that seemed to pierce the stillness.
What are you talking about? A lover? his voice trembled, laying bare the fear and turmoil of the past months. He felt the ground crumble beneath his feet.
Emily, Irene finally said, crossing her arms over her chest. Your assistant, I suppose? Shes only twentyfive. She says shes been with you for four months now. Congratulations, dear.
In Irenes eyes was a grief so deep Andrew wanted to sink into the earthor to wake up, as if it were all a nightmare.
Irene, Ill explain he began, but the words caught in his throat.
Explain what? she chuckled hoarsely. What exactly are you trying to explain, Andrew? That you were having fun with your secretary while I was running from doctor to doctor? Or that you lied, saying you were staying late at work?
The pan hissed, and the smell of burnt meat filled the kitchen. Irene reflexively turned the gas off, as if that could halt the pain, the bitterness, the betrayal.
You know whats the most revolting? her voice dropped to a whisper. I suspected it all along. All those meetings, latenight calls, business trips I believed you like a fool.
Listen, Irene Andrew stepped toward his wife, but she thrust out a hand as if erecting an invisible wall.
Dont come near! tears glistened in her eyes. Lord, its filthy twenty years down the drain!
Stop, he tried to steady himself, his voice shaking. Lets just talk calmly. Its complicated.
Complicated? Irene laughed again, a sound that crackled with sobbing. Whats so complicated? Youve taken a young lover. Shes flown in. And me? her voice broke, Im just an old woman who cant have children, is that it?
Dont say that! He stepped forward, attempting an embrace.
Irene recoiled as if burned, and a sharp slap ripped through the kitchens silence.
Get out, she whispered, her voice trembling. Get out to her. If she could give you what I never could.
Eri
Go! she snatched the salt cellar from the table and flung it at him.
Andrew recoiled; the crystal grains scattered across the floor, glinting in the lamplight. Bad omen, flickered through his mind.
Ill call, he muttered, edging to the door.
Irene turned silently to the window, shoulders shaking as if chilled, though the night outside was already warm.
In the hallway, pulling his coat fast, he heard a low sob. His hand froze on the doorknob. What could he possibly say? How could he justify the betrayal?
The front door slammed shut. The empty flat fell into a deafening hush, save for the tick of the mantel clockhis parents wedding giftcounting the seconds of their twentyfouryear marriage.
Irene sank slowly onto a kitchen chair, her gaze falling on the spilled salt. They say salt brings misfortune, she thought, then burst into a manic laugh. It was as if the white crystals on the dark floor had shattered her world.
His coat pocket buzzed. A text from an unknown number appeared: Im sorry. I didnt mean for this to happen. Emily
Wretch, Irene hissed, clutching the phone to her chest. Little pest
Rain began to tap against the windowpanes, each drop a lonely note on the sill, like a mournful xylophone.
She rose, grabbed a broom and a dustpan, and while scooping the salt she mused bitterly, I never even asked whether shes expecting a boy or a girl
She paused, the dustpan tight in her grip. The rain, the ticking, the saltall merged into a single, relentless stream, as if her life now existed only in these minutiae.
Andrew sat in his car, staring at his phone. Fifteen missed calls from his motherof course it was Irene calling his motherinlaw, always doting on the daughterinlaw. What now? he asked his reflection in the rearview mirror. The gaunt, fortyfiveyearold man stared back with disapproval.
The phone buzzed again. Emily lit up the screen.
Yes, love
Where are you? her voice quivered, on the verge of tears. I was so scared She was terrifying!
Who? Andrew asked, bewildered.
Your wife! She came to my office, caused a scene
What? When?
An hour ago She was screaming that Id ruined your family, threw papers at me They were the results of her checkups.
He sank his head onto the steering wheel, a groan escaping him.
I didnt know Emily continued. I truly didnt know you couldnt have children. I thought you just didnt want them
Aye, I knew I knew and still he thought, bitter.
Come over, she pleaded. Im scared being alone.
Im on my way, he said tersely.
He turned the ignition, but before the car could move the phone rang againhis mother.
Yes, Mum.
Oh, you wretched fool! Her voice roared. What have you done? Have you lost your conscience?
Mum
Silence! Irenes crying, barely holding herself together after all these years together, and youwhat have you done? Youve tangled with a girl!
Im sorry
Ill not be your mother any longer! Until you sober up, dont call, dont show yourself at the door!
She slammed the receiver. Andrew let the phone drop onto his lap, suddenly heavy. The engine idled, a soft hum filling the quiet. He glanced at Irenes housewarm light spilling from the windowsyet he could not bring himself to go there. He turned the key off; the car exhaled and fell still. In the sudden, deafening silence he whispered, Damned, his fingers clenching the steering wheel until his knuckles whitened.
Another buzz: a message from Irene: Divorce papers will be ready in a week. Collect your things this weekend. Im leaving.
He read it over and over. Divorce. Twentyfour years. Everything shattered.
A fresh call from Emily: Are you coming? My stomach hurts
Yes, on my way! He jerked the wheel, as if the steering could fling him from this nightmare.
Rain hammered harder, wipers fighting a losing battle, the town blurring into grey smears against the windscreen.
The phone chirped again, likely his mother again. He didnt even look. What difference did it make? Everything was already falling apart, and he could not grasp how it had happened.
A year earlier Emily had arrived as an internbright, hopeful eyes, the same kind of adoration Irene once gave him in their university days. A company party, a flirtatious touch, and soon he was whisking Emily to restaurants, buying flowers, feeling young again.
He rented a flat for their clandestine meetings, watching her glow with happiness, dreaming of a future.
Fool, he thought, staring at the rainslick road. Old fool.
The phone rang once more.
What now he answered without looking. Emily, I
It isnt Emily, Irenes voice cut in, oddly calm. Ive done a test. Guess what? Im expecting a child too.
Everything seemed to freeze. A sudden screech of brakes, a crash, darkness.
Heart attack, the doctor said bluntly. Plus a severe head injury. Condition critical.
Irene stood by the intensivecare window, watching her husband tangled in tubes and wires. Beside her, Emilys chubby face was hidden in her hands, soft sobs escaping.
Stop wailing, Irene said, not looking at her. This isnt a drama.
Sorry Emily whispered, wiping tears, Its just the baby
Of course, Irene replied dryly, a smirk forming. A baby without a father. How amusing. And Im a widow. Brilliant, isnt it?
Did did you also? Emily stammered, eyes flicking to Irenes barely noticeable belly.
Got knocked up too? Irene laughed. Twentyfour years of nothing, and nowbam! Perhaps from the stress.
The monitor ticked softly. The rain pattered against the panes, refusing to let anyone forget that life continued beyond the sterile walls. A strange, invisible link bound the storm to the events inside.
I loved him from the first term, Irene said, never taking her eyes off the still form. He was skinny, glasses, the nerdy boy everyone teased. All the girls asked what I saw in him. I saw the real him.
Emily stared at the thin curtain, as if it might shelter her.
Then came the weddingrings, veil, the whole shebang. His mother even said, What a fine daughterinlaw youll be. And I felt defective.
Dont say that, Emily murmured, voice as faint as a falling leaf.
How else to put it? Ive been through countless doctors, endless procedures. He kept telling me, Dont worry, love, well manage without kids. He lied. He just lied.
He loves you, Emily tried, but the words felt hollow.
And you? Irene snapped, her tone sharp as a knife. How many doctors have you seen? How many tests? He kept saying, Well be fine. He was lying. Purely lying.
He truly loves you, Emily said, but even she seemed uncertain.
Irene laughed, a bitter sound. Isnt it funny? I almost understand you, young and in love, losing your head for a successful man. I was the same. Only my mistake is that the man is still my husband.
Andrew shifted slightly in his bed. Both women leaned forward, but the room fell quiet again.
What shall we do? Emily asked.
What will you do? Irene sighed. Andrew will have two heirs or heirstobe. Whats the difference?
And he? Emily probed.
And him? Irene asked, bitterness lacing her gaze. Hell choose, I suppose. He can have the old wife with a trailer or the young lover with a baby bump.
Im not competing, Emily whispered, trying to pull herself from the words.
Dont you dare, Irene snapped. You all claim something. Listen, girl
I wont give up whats mine. Twentyfour years is mine, understand? You just hopped onto a strangers train, but its not your route, not your station.
A nurse cleared her throat softly. Excuse me, visiting hours are over.
Of course, Irene straightened. Come, lets fetch a cup of tea. Well be here a while yet.
A week later Andrew awoke to find his wife sitting beside his bed, a hand resting gently on his stomach. A thought flickered through his mind: How did I never notice?
Eleanor? his voice rasped, foreign to his own ears.
She flinched, eyes widening. Arrived, handsome? I thought you were up there with the angels flirting with young cherubs.
Sorry
Dont start, Irene snapped. Your solicitor was here. I wont split the housekeep the car if you need it. Ive quit my job.
What? Andrew tried to rise, panic flooding his face. Why?
Im moving back to Loxley, to my parents place, she said calmly, as if discussing a grocery run. The air is cleaner there. Better for the child.
Eri
Its necessary, Andrew. Its necessary, she smiled, not with joy but relief. You know Ive reconsidered everything while you lay there in that blackout. I was a foolish old woman, but not because I believed you. I was scared to live without you.
I love you, he whispered, as if the words might change anything.
You love she nodded, not looking at him. Perhaps, in a way. Like a habit, a part of life. But I dont want to be a habit, you see?
She stood, brushed off her dress as if shedding a weight not hers. Emily visited daily, cried, said shed give up all claims. Silly girl I gave her the number of a good gynaecologist and a realtorshell find a bigger flat. A oneroom wont do with a baby.
You what? Andrew stared, disbelief etched across his face.
Whats the matter? she shrugged. Were in the same boat now. Or rather, the same position Funny, isnt it? Years of emptiness, and suddenly two lives at once. They say misfortune never comes alone. Happiness doesnt either.
Outside, a spring thunderstorm rolled, tearing the day into fragments.
Dont linger, Irene leaned forward, kissing his forehead gently, a simple, ordinary farewell. Ive called a taxi, sent the belongings. Sign the divorce papers when you feel betterwhere else to rush?
Eri
You know, she paused at the doorway, turning back, I truly loved youmadly, tremblingly but now its as if a breath of air has freed me. Thank you for that.
She slipped out, quietly closing the door. A faint scent of her perfume lingered, the same fragrance hed given her each wedding anniversary.
Andrew stared out at the window where the spring storm mixed rain with snow. In the damp March town, two women bore his children in their heartsdifferent worlds, yet somehow alike. Two paths, one story.
Wonder, he thought, whether the children will ever be friends or share the same life
