Hey, love, let me tell you whats been happening with Paula and Alex. Theyve been married twentysix years now. They met back at university, got hitched straight after graduating, and two years later their son James was born. Just a typical English family, nothing fancy.
James grew up, married, and moved to London with his wife. After he left, things at home shifted dramatically for Paula and Alex. Suddenly they had nothing much to chat about, and honestly, they didnt even feel the need. Theyd known each other insideout, could finish each others sentences with a glance. A couple of words would do, then silence.
When Paula first started her job after university, there was a woman in the office about fortyfive, but she seemed older to Paula because of her youthful looks. Shed always take a winter break, coming back with an even tan. Her short, boyish blonde haircut only highlighted the sunkissed skin.
Must be doing a lot of sunbathing, a fresh junior whispered to Paula.
One day Paula finally asked how she managed such a glow in the depths of winter.
Were at a ski resort in the Alps with our husbands, she replied.
Really? At your age?
The woman laughed, Age? Im only fortyfive. When you reach my years youll see this is the real youth not foolish, but mature. Listen, love, boredom is the biggest enemy of a marriage. All the affairs, the splits start because people are bored. When the kids grow up, life becomes cosy and predictable, and thats when men start losing their minds. We women never have time to be bored we work, we look after the kids, the house, everything. Meanwhile the bloke lounges on the sofa, thinks about how to burn off that idle energy. Some drink, some hunt for new thrills, as they say, they start looking for another woman.
I was naïve, thinking my husband was just tired from work, that it was harmless for him to sit in front of the telly, not drink, and that was fine. I was buzzing around the house like a windup toy. Then one day he blurted out hed fallen for someone else, that he was bored with me, and he left. Can you imagine?
When I remarried, I did things differently. I made my husband pitch in at home, wed always escape the city on weekends, go out to the countryside, ski in winter. I never let him relax on that couch. Were still together, the kids are grown, and were travelling around the UK. It might not be for everyone, but take something from this.
Paula never forgot that older womans advice. She started noticing Alex, after a hearty roast dinner, drifting straight for the sofa and the TV. He was harder to coax out of the house than he used to be. He used to love hiking, river rafting, all that adventurous stuff, and shed always get surprise gifts from him on her birthday.
She tried to shake him up bought theatre tickets, even a threedeck river cruise on the Thames around the Golden Circle. In the theatre Alex dozed off, at a friend’s house hed yawning after a couple of glasses of wine, always racing back to that beloved couch. On the cruise he complained about the cramped cabin. The idea of skiing? He was now a bit too heavyset to bother.
One evening Paula suggested a night at the cinema. He looked at her with those mournful eyes and said, Where are you dragging me? I just want to nap on the weekend, catch up on sleep. Go with your mates.
Back when they first lived together, Alex used to go on weekend hikes with his mates. Theyd formed a little crew, loved kayaking down fast rivers with rapids. Hed play the guitar and sing a decent tune. Paula never joined work, pregnancy, looking after little James kept her at home.
Dont give him free rein, warned Paulas mum. Hell find a partner who shares his hobbies.
Cheating doesnt need a hike, you can find trouble right here, Paula replied. I trust Alex, Im waiting for his trips to finish.
Eventually the hiking gang settled down, had families, and stopped getting out.
One lazy Sunday Paula plopped beside Alex on the sofa with an old photo album. At first she was reluctant, but then she got drawn in, looking at the pictures and reminiscing.
Fancy reliving the old days, remember the youthful thrills? she asked.
No, who would I go with? Everyones got their own lives, grandkids.
Just me. I never went on those hikes with you. Show some initiative, call your old mates, maybe theyll say yes.
What? Those were the reckless, carefree days, and now? Alex muttered.
Too wise for our own good? Paula replied with a cheeky grin. Then lets hit the theatre this weekend, have a proper cultural night. She slammed the album shut, sending a puff of dust into the air.
Alex mulled it over. Later at dinner he said, I chatted with Tom about a route. He still has his old tents. We could rent a raft from the club. Paula saw his eyes light up that was a good sign.
He warned, Itll be tough for a beginner river, rapids, mosquitoes. Well be sleeping on the ground in sleeping bags, no showers, no proper toilets, well have to scramble under bushes. Youll probably want to head back on day one.
I wont quit, Paula promised.
Alright then. Alex gave her a skeptical look, his polished brogues and soft slippers, his cosy robe with little birds. Well need proper gear, not stilettos.
They went shopping together, Alex barely letting her out of his sight.
I know youll fill the cart with swimsuits and dresses, but for a trek you need warm jackets and sturdy boots.
Paula followed his lead, eager to prove herself. Soon the backpacks were packed.
Put it on, lets see how you handle it, Alex said.
She hoisted the sack, wobbling like a newborn, and almost fell under its weight. Take it off, Alex ordered. Lets see what youve got inside.
She dropped the load, relieved. From the bag he pulled hair ties, a cosmetics case, a tiny hairdryer, endless bottles of cream and shampoo all great for a weekend in the garden, useless for the hills.
Mosquitoes will have a field day, he joked. Maybe youd rather stay home? He looked at her with a hint of pity.
She stared, confused. Alex stripped the bag of everything nonessential, leaving only the basics. The pack became much lighter.
Ive got this, she declared, feeling a spark of confidence.
She remembered how shed tried to drag Alex into the theatre and art galleries, nudging him to share her interests. Hed eventually go, at least once. As his partner, she felt she should stand by him through rough and smooth.
The closer they got to departure, the more doubts crept in. They were at the train station platform, waiting for the coach that would whisk them away from the comforts of civilisation. Besides Alex, there were three other men and a woman.
Are your other mates divorced? Paula asked quietly.
No, their wives and grandkids are at home, Alex replied.
The train ride was lively the men swapped funny stories, Alex strummed his guitar, pulling it from the loft. Paula decided she could handle whatever came next.
But when they finally left the station and trekked away from it, her back ached from the pack, her legs trembled, sweat soaked her face. She felt embarrassed to complain; the other blokes were lugging sleeping bags, tents, even a deflated inflatable boat.
The scenery was gorgeous, but she was too focused on not tripping, not falling, not breaking a leg. When they reached the river, she just wanted to lie on the grass and never move again. The men quickly built a fire and pitched their tents as if they werent exhausted.
Give it time, encouraged Tamsin, one of the women. Lets fetch some water, we need to cook dinner.
She was on the brink of tears, longing for a hot shower and a soft bed.
Then the night fell, and Alex played his guitar by the fire, singing with a voice that made her forget how tired she was. He seemed alive again, full of humour, the Alex she fell for years ago.
Thinking of running off? he teased the next morning, eyeing the blisters on her hands from the raft.
No, she said firmly.
At the rapids she hesitated, the water roaring, sharp stones jutting out. She wanted to suggest taking the bank route, but Alexs grin stopped her. She clung to the rafts side, forgetting the oars, terrified of plunging into the icy flow.
When the rapids finally passed, she exhaled a huge sigh and shouted with joy louder than anyone else.
They got back home after a week, exhausted but buzzing with new memories. Paula realised shed miss the fresh air, new friends, campfire songs, the open space.
After a hot shower and a hearty dinner, they perched side by side with a laptop, scrolling through the photos, teasing each other. They hadnt sat like this for ages. The trek had brought them closer, gave them common ground again. They fell asleep in each others arms, just like in their early days.
Next year, another trek? Paula whispered, snuggling into Alexs warm side.
You liked it, did you? he laughed. Thats not a night out at the theatre or a fancy restaurant. Thats real life.
Now I know how to prepare better. You wont be embarrassed for me, she promised.
And I wasnt embarrassed at all. For a rookie you did brilliantly. You surprised me. His praise made her cheeks glow.
When James called, she rattled off the whole adventure.
Your lifes a whirlwind, I thought youd be bored and lonely, he said.
Were not, Paula replied. Hows everything with you?
Waiting for a son or a daughter, he laughed.
Back at work after her break, Paula walked in all brighteyed, sporting a ropebeaded bracelet.
Did you spend the summer down south? You look barely tanned, a colleague teased, pointing at the bracelet.
Its a charm. A shaman gave it to me, Paula replied with a grin.
So, if you want to bring the spark back, dont just sit at home. Find something you can share with your partner. It might not be extreme for everyone, but theres always something else to try. As some writer put it, Never regret the effort you put into saving love.
